A week ago today, Mike, a fellow recovering sex addict was sentenced and given a custodial.
I hadn’t known him for very long because I’ve only been going to SAA for about two and a half months and I didn’t know him very well, but what I did know of him I liked.
I didn’t know what his crime(s) were and I didn’t ask. I figured that was his business and his past and my relationship with him was not to judge him on who he may have been but on who he is now.
Mike and Tom were the first two guys that I met at my first SAA meeting. They were waiting outside, greeting people. I was was really nervous and didn’t know what to expect. I was so pleasantly surprised by the warm and open welcome that I received that I instantly began to feel more at ease.
Mike took the time to talk to me whilst we got a cup of tea and waited for the meeting to start. He, like everyone else I’ve met at SAA and AA didn’t judge me, they just welcomed me and wished me all the best for my recovery.
The night before Mike’s sentencing, I went for a soft drink with him and Stuart. At the beginning of the evening I had no idea what was in store for him the following day. Over the next couple of hours I kind of gathered that something was up and towards the end of the evening Mike told me about his sentencing appearance.
When he told me I was shocked. Not because of his impending sentencing appearance or the fact that he seemed convinced he was going to get a custodial, but because of how calm and collected he was.
He kept saying that there is no point in worrying because it doesn’t achieve anything. It made me wonder how I might face a similar situation.
His state of mind that evening gives me hope that although he is currently spending time behind bars, he is in fact free. Sometimes we can have all the freedom in the world but we are trapped behind our own prison bars of addiction and depression.
For everyone out there struggling today with isolating addictive behaviours and/or depressive illness think of Mike and how accepting who you are and the consequences of your actions is the first step to recovery, peace of mind and your own inner freedom.